The emotional toll of quitting in Japan—and the role of professional quitters

20 nov 2024

5 min

The emotional toll of quitting in Japan—and the role of professional quitters
autor
Kim Cunningham

Senior Editor at Welcome to the Jungle

Quitting a job is never easy, but in Japan, it can feel like an emotional minefield. In a culture where loyalty to one’s company is deeply ingrained and work is often seen as a core part of one’s identity, the act of resigning carries a heavy burden of guilt, shame, and anxiety. For many, leaving a job isn’t just a professional decision—it’s seen as disrupting harmony and abandoning a sense of duty.

To avoid these emotional challenges, some workers in Japan are turning to an unconventional solution: hiring professional “quitters” to handle the resignation process for them. These agencies step in to draft resignation letters, inform employers, and navigate the complex social dynamics of leaving a job. One quitting agency, in particular, assists over 10,000 employees per year in quitting their jobs. But what is it about Japanese work culture that makes quitting so fraught? And why are some workers willing to pay someone else to do it for them?

The role of professional quitters

Quitting agencies—companies that handle resignation logistics—are becoming increasingly visible in Japan. These agencies manage everything from drafting resignation letters to notifying employers, allowing employees to avoid direct confrontation. For workers overwhelmed by the thought of personally delivering their resignation, these services offer an alternative.

While the idea of outsourcing a resignation may seem extreme to those outside Japan, it reflects deep-seated cultural norms. “Once someone decides to quit,” explains Glen Brewster, an executive recruiter based in Tokyo, “they’ve made that huge life decision, and they just want to walk away without dealing with the company anymore.” Brewster notes that the services can be especially appealing for employees leaving toxic workplaces or dealing with overbearing managers.

However, not everyone sees quitting agencies as a widely adopted solution. Maxime Perret, another recruiter based in Tokyo, notes that the popularity of quitting agencies is often exaggerated in Western media. He believes the prevalence of these agencies is overstated, though he acknowledges that such services align with Japan’s tendency to provide paid solutions for personal challenges.

Why quitting is so emotionally difficult in Japan

The cultural expectations around work in Japan contribute significantly to the emotional burden of quitting. As Brewster explains, loyalty to one’s employer often runs deeper than in many other countries. “[In Japan] when you join a company, you’re joining a family,” he says. This cultural framing positions resigning not as a career choice, but as a betrayal of colleagues, mentors, and the organization itself.

Perret adds that Japan’s emphasis on appearances further complicates the decision to quit. “Japan has a big appearance culture,” he notes. “You need to make sure you don’t make waves, but resigning from a place is making waves.” This pressure to maintain harmony can deter workers from speaking up or leaving, even when staying is detrimental to their mental health.

For Chelsea Quezergue, an American expatriate living in Japan, the experience of quitting was fraught with anxiety and guilt. “There was all of this buildup and anxiety leading up to the time when I knew I was going to hand in my resignation,” she recalls. “I didn’t know exactly how my boss might respond.” Although she ultimately left her position, the process left her emotionally drained—an experience she attributes to Japan’s unique work culture.

Gaman: The endurance mindset

One key factor contributing to Japan’s resignation culture is the concept of gaman, which is described as enduring discomfort without complaint. This value permeates Japanese society, including its work environments. “It’s really looked down upon in Japan to be the one that’s complaining,” he says. He explains that if everyone else is enduring the same discomfort, you’re expected to endure it too.

This cultural expectation can create additional barriers to quitting, as employees feel pressure to persevere, even in untenable situations. Brewster likens it to enduring a crowded Tokyo train during rush hour: “You can hardly catch your breath. You don’t hear one person complaining about it—[you] just have to make it to the next stop.”

Familial and social pressures

For many workers, the challenges of quitting extend beyond the workplace. Brewster recounts cases where family members actively discouraged resignations. In one instance, a candidate’s wife and her family opposed his decision to leave a prestigious company, fearing the instability of his chosen path. “The wife’s family were against him taking the job and in fact, he didn’t succeed in resigning from his company,” he shares.

These pressures can make quitting feel like not just a professional decision but a personal and social conflict. Quezergue, reflecting on her own experience, notes, “If I had Japanese values instilled in me, it definitely would have been a more stressful ordeal … Japanese people are raised to believe that work is almost more important than anything else.”

The “Humiliation Ritual”

In some traditional companies, resigning can involve what Brewster calls “humiliation rituals.” These processes often include a series of meetings with high-ranking executives and even external partners, designed to make the employee feel uncomfortable about their decision. “They say ‘Look, we will accept this but you’re going to have to explain things to our partners because they’re going to be worried that one of our employees is leaving and we’re going to have to set up a meeting for you with the partners to explain things … And also our CEO wants to talk to you.’” Brewster shares, highlighting that this kind of behavior is designed to make the employee second guess themselves. He adds that these tactics can deter employees from leaving or delay their departure long enough to disrupt their plans.

Brewster also notes that while toxic bosses are not the root cause of every resignation, when working with job hunters on the lookout for a new role, he does often ask, ‘How is your relationship with your boss? What type of personality is he?’ The use of the male pronoun is not a slip of the tongue. He explains that, while it differs from one industry to another, “the majority of leaders in Japan are still men.” Only 11% of management roles in Japan are held by women, reinforcing traditional gender roles in the workplace. However, this number is rising slowly year over year.

Generational shifts and the rise of quiet quitting

While traditional attitudes toward work remain dominant in Japan, younger generations are beginning to challenge these norms. Perret observes that Millennials and Gen Z employees are less likely to subscribe to the notion of lifetime employment. In fact, as of 2020, 8.8% of Japanese companies have lifetime employment, whereas lifetime employment applied to about 20% of the working population in Japan ten years prior. Perret explains that startups and foreign companies are creating environments where job changes are more accepted.

In addition to more frequent job changes, the trend of quiet quitting has gained traction in Japan. Quiet quitting, where employees disengage and do the bare minimum without formally resigning, reflects a subtle pushback against Japan’s work culture. Perret notes that this approach may appeal to workers who find the idea of confronting their employer too daunting.

Toward a more flexible work culture

Japan’s deeply ingrained resignation culture is slowly evolving, driven by generational shifts, international influences, and growing awareness of mental health. Brewster believes these changes are essential for Japan’s workforce to adapt to its aging population and shrinking labor pool. “They’re going to need a lot more flexibility,” he says, sharing that the workforce dynamics are shifting.

While quitting agencies offer one way to navigate Japan’s challenging resignation process, a broader cultural shift is needed to alleviate the emotional toll of leaving a job. For now, professional quitters remain a lifeline for those seeking a way out, highlighting the complexities of quitting in Japan’s unique work culture.

Photo: Welcome to the Jungle
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