When smooth talkers monopolize meetings

“They talk and talk until they find something to say.” That’s one definition of so-called “smooth talkers” that many of us can recognize—especially when it comes to meetings. These outstanding orators thrive in front of a captive audience, leaving their colleagues on the sidelines.

Ah, smooth talkers. While they like to dominate discussions and charm everyone with their eloquence, the substance behind their monologues is often surprisingly slim. People who talk a lot often say very little. Even worse, they create an imbalanced power dynamic by monopolizing meetings while others are left waiting for a chance to speak. This can lead to longer meetings that end with no clear outcomes while stifling the diversity of ideas and undermining collaboration. So, why do smooth talkers act this way? How should you respond? To find out, we spoke to Louis Vareille, who is an expert on how to run meetings, and Pierre-Louis de Rohan Chabot, a consultant coach. They share strategies for rebalancing the conversation to ensure every idea makes its way into the discussion.

How to spot a smooth talker

Despite what you might expect, Vareille says it’s not always easy to spot a smooth talker. The real test lies in the action, or rather inaction, that follows their words after a meeting. According to Vareille, smooth talkers leave a trail of broken promises and unfinished tasks. “The most common type of smooth talker in meetings is what I call the ‘dominator.’ That’s the one who talks a lot and is persuasive but does nothing,” says Vareille. This disconnect between words and actions is typical of a smooth talker.

The reactions of others are also telling. If they sigh, check the time, or give sideways glances, you can take those as signs that the speaker is neither engaging nor being taken seriously.

Why do they do chatter incessantly?

Vareille says there are several reasons why some people adopt the role of smooth talker.

• Stress management: In a high-stakes meeting, monopolizing the conversation allows some to feel more in control of the situation. They may be doing this unconsciously to relieve anxiety, create an image of competence, or divert attention from their insecurities.
• Structuring ideas: Sometimes extroverts talk to organize their thoughts. This habit isn’t intended to cause problems, but their way of processing information can lead to a monologue.
• Defense mechanism: A misperception of the stakes at a meeting can create defensive responses that are disproportionate to the reality of the discussion. In other words, they may overreact if they think the stakes are high.
• Need for validation: Some feel the need to assert themselves so they can impress everyone and show others how important they are.
• The illusion of participation: Some try to fill gaps in any discussion by talking. This is usually done to cover up their lack of preparation, reinforce their point of view, or participate for the sake of it.

The power of words: How speech influences authority

All meetings involve complex dynamics. Powerful words can overshadow the purpose of a meeting, but it’s important to recognize that this behavior isn’t always deliberate but can result from subtle group dynamics. “In every team, there will be the know-it-all, the scapegoat, the peacemaker, the party planner, etc, and everyone sticks to their role because that is what’s expected,” explains Chabot. Whether conscious or not, these roles help to shape interactions within the team, creating a dynamic that’s difficult to change. The smooth talker emerges as the main character, often seen as essential to leading discussions and guiding the team.

These roles can become comfort zones for everyone involved. They offer security and predictability, but they hinder the functioning of the group. This can also restrict the diversity of perspectives and limit the scope of debates. As long as the overall system is untouched, power dynamics remain concentrated in the hands of a few. “These dynamics promote the persistence of existing power structures and hinder innovation by reducing the diversity of ideas expressed,” Vareille says. It’s a vicious circle where the same people dominate, the same ideas circulate, and little space is left for questioning or creativity.

“Small voices” in the shadow of smooth talkers

Typically extroverted, smooth talkers have a talent for capturing attention, but their eloquence can come at a high cost for group dynamics. “Smooth talkers take more than their share of speaking time, which limits the contributions of other team members. This leads to underrepresentation of perspectives within a group,” says Chabot. When the same loud voices dominate a meeting, the consequences go beyond interruptions. Those who don’t like speaking up are often overshadowed and find themselves marginalized. This lack of total team participation directly affects the ideas and concerns of the team. It’s an important issue for Chabot, as collaboration and diversity of ideas are the keys to success. “It’s good to know where you’re going, to be assertive and provide direction, but it doesn’t leave room for vulnerability, questions, alternatives, or debates; it creates doubt. Listening to quieter or less experienced team members allows us to identify new solutions.”

For Chabot, this problem is twofold:

• Decreased team efficiency: By not allowing all team members to contribute equally, the decisions made don’t reflect the whole team’s perspective. “When only a few people control the conversation, meeting efficiency is reduced, and we’re at risk of losing important viewpoints,” says Chabot.
• Compromised decisions: When meetings revolve around the same ideas from the same people, the entire group risks missing out on hearing the necessary information to make informed and innovative decisions. This limits the team’s creative potential and threatens its ability to solve problems effectively.

Strategies to deal with smooth talkers

How do you break the cycle? Vareille and Chabot share strategies for dealing with smooth talkers before, during, and after meetings.

Before the meeting: preparation and anticipation

• Know the participants: Even before a meeting starts, it’s essential to understand the dynamics at play and identify smooth talkers. Vareille says this allows you “to anticipate potential challenges, consider the relevance of their presence in the meeting, and adapt the meeting management strategy.”
• Communicate openly: It’s essential to be frank with those who tend to dominate meetings and to do it before any meeting. Vareille suggests emphasizing the team’s interests: “I might say, for example, that Vanessa, who is reserved, will be at this meeting, and I want to hear from her.”
• Establish clear rules: Before the meeting, let everyone know the format and that there will be an equitable distribution of speaking time. According to Chabot, rules set by the group allow you to address an issue without criticizing a smooth talker.

During the meeting: active moderation

• Set a time limit for speaking: To create balance from the start, Chabot allocates speaking time to each participant before the meeting begins. This ensures everyone has the opportunity to speak and encourages the talkers to condense their ideas.
• Politely interrupt excessive talk: If some continue to monopolize the conversation, a polite interruption will refocus the discussion. Vareille suggests saying, “Thanks, but I feel we’re straying from the topic.” This approach, which is respectful to everyone, keeps the meeting focused.
• Assign tasks: With persistent talkers, Vareille suggests giving them some responsibilities: “Can you prepare a summary for next week’s meeting because you know this subject well?” This method not only channels the energy of smooth talkers but also values their skills and commitment.
• Use silence strategically: Inspired by Sun Tzu in The Art of War, Vareille and Chabot suggest incorporating silent reflection. This quiets smooth talkers and encourages introverts to share their ideas. “If I ask the group a question, the smooth talker won’t think before speaking and will prevent introverts from reflecting. I suggest taking three minutes to think quietly,” says Vareille.
• Reassure the smooth talker: Smooth talkers have a need to be recognized, so Chabot advises giving them positive attention and validating their contribution. “This way, we can naturally reduce their need to dominate the meeting.”

After the meeting: feedback

• Provide constructive feedback: Vareille says that positive feedback should be used after the meeting to reinforce the desired behavior. If someone who is usually dominant moderates their behavior, it’s crucial to acknowledge that. For team members still needing to improve their contribution to the meeting, constructive feedback is also helpful. This should be specific, focused on particular actions, and delivered respectfully.
• Engage in a group discussion: Vareille suggests setting up a group discussion on how to manage speaking. “I ask how it went. This allows people to express themselves on how the meeting was managed.” This practice not only encourages open group discussion about the dynamics of the meeting but can also highlight ways to make improvements in the future.
• Offer individual support: Chabot recommends individual coaching for smooth talkers who have difficulty adjusting their behavior. “A smooth talker who is held back may find that he needs to express himself in other ways, perhaps by being an opposing voice. This can be counterproductive. If I want to keep smooth talkers engaged and on the team, I need a coach to work with them.”

Rather than thinking of smooth talkers as obstacles, we can view them as challenges to overcome together so as to create a space where all opinions are valued. Change is possible. If we take the appropriate action, we can shape meetings that inspire collaboration, creativity, and progress. So, we need to continue to question our group dynamics and power systems; encourage open, inclusive, and gender-balanced communication; and recognize the value of each contribution.

Photo: Welcome to the Jungle

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