Find your dream job through the quiet power of self-awareness

Dana Balicki was a rebellious teenager attending high school in Calabasas, California, when she first glimpsed the path her life might take. “There were a lot of wealthy, entitled kids in that school and they used to leave a lot of trash everywhere for the cleaners to take care of,” she says. At one point, the janitorial staff decided to stop cleaning up after the students and go on strike. “I knew how bad the trash problem was because I used to get in trouble a lot and had to do detention, which included picking up trash,” she recalls. Watching the staff stand up for themselves impressed her, awakening a deep belief in the power of collective action to drive change. Without realizing it, she had identified one of her core values in life.

Looking back, Balicki sees this as a pivotal moment life. During her time at university, she became an activist and later worked as a communications specialist for nonprofits she cared about, such as Code-Pink Women for Peace, an anti-war organization. Since 2011, she has been a transformational coach, helping others “get clear on their truth and trust themselves enough to live it.” That high school incident helped her recognize one of her core values, a practice she emphasizes as crucial for understanding what you want from your career—whether you’re starting out, chasing the next paycheck, or looking to switch paths.

Pinpointing your values

Not everyone has a defining moment from their childhood to act as their north star. Balicki recommends taking quiet time to listen to yourself to identify your values and your purpose. If you don’t know where to start, try using Nir Eyal’s value list as a guide. Eyal, a behavioral specialist and author, argues that knowing your values helps you make decisions aligned with who you aspire to be.

Is financial security at the top of your list? Or is it family, spirituality, or social impact? You decide. Identifying your values will help you choose roles or organizations where you can thrive. Researching a company’s culture and mission can also give you an edge in interviews, allowing you to authentically connect with their vision.

Accessing self-awareness

We all experience flashes of self-awareness, sqys Balicki, but harnessing them requires mindfulness. “People often seek to access their portal to self-awareness at big life-shift moments, but that can be like running a marathon without training. There needs to be a practice of self-awareness,” she advises. Journaling, whether on paper or digitally, is a simple yet powerful method. “Ask yourself: How did I feel today? Were there moments when I felt triggered? What was that about?”

In this always-on world, slowing down and listening to yourself can yield real insights that can help you recognize your strengths, passions, and values. “Start to see yourself as worthy of focused attention on a regular basis, even in the small moments,” says Balicki. Otherwise, you may find yourself looking to others to define your next steps. Journaling can also illuminate lessons from your past, turning them into guideposts for the future.

Tuning into yourself

Self-awareness is linked to higher levels of well-being at work, improved communication and confidence. It also results in better levels of self-esteem and creativity, and is a cornerstone of emotional intelligence. “Integrating self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, and empathy enables individuals to navigate their social environment effectively, rendering emotional intelligence a precious asset in both personal and professional domains,” according to Professor Hera Antonopoulou of the University of Patras in Greece. It is associated with “effectively navigating interpersonal challenges, resolving conflicts, regulating aggressive tendencies, and addressing work-related obstacles.”

Like many personal skills, self-awareness can be improved with training—but there’s no need to rely on others unless you want to. Like Balicki, Tiffany Clarke, a career strategist at Evergreen Blueprint, says the key is being honest with yourself, even though this isn’t always easy. “As we learn from therapy, a lot of feelings happen in your body, but you have to be willing to listen to those feelings, those sensations or discomfort,” she says. “If you’re processing something and run into a wall, or what you believe to be a limitation, that’s an opportunity to explore that feeling. That’s how you deepen your ability to be intuitive.”

The key is to ensure that what you think you want aligns with what you truly need to be happy.

Noticing patterns in life

Clarke highlights how our upbringing shapes our career choices. “Childhood patterns or trauma contribute to the choices that you make as an adult, whether that be interpersonal relationships or your career,” she explains. For instance, women from poorer backgrounds often gravitate toward helping professions that offer security but lower pay. Similarly, some individuals take high-paying roles simply to meet family expectations or pay off student loans.

To break free from these patterns, ask yourself: Am I happy in my role, or am I fulfilling others’ expectations? Clarke recommends tools like the CliftonStrengths Assessment or the Enneagram System to better understand yourself. You can also gather feedback from colleagues, friends, and family to identify strengths and passions you might overlook. Reflecting on activities you loved as a child can also uncover innate talents and interests.

Fill in the gaps

Once you’re clear on what your strengths are and what you love, you’ll be able to identify where there may be gaps in your knowledge, training, or experience. “Whether you’re changing careers, coming back to work after a break, or trying to move up, understanding your strengths and what you love helps bridge gaps and find the right fit,” says Kraig Kleeman, a branding consultant and founder of the New Workforce. Kleeman also advises using journaling and tests such as the CliftonStrengths Assessment to get some answers.

“No matter where you’re coming from, knowing yourself can open up lots of opportunities,” Kleeman explains. “Your ideal job isn’t just any position—it’s one that fits who you are and what you want to become. Maybe you care a lot about teamwork, or maybe you want to make a difference in your community. Knowing this helps you find a place that fits you.”

8 questions to uncover your dream job

Self-awareness begins with asking the right questions. Kleeman suggests these to help you clarify your values, passions, and strengths:

1. What activities make me lose track of time?
2. What tasks energize me? Which ones drain me?
3. What kind of work environment do I thrive in?
4. What are my long-term goals, and how does the job I want help me reach them?
5. How do I define success for myself?
6. What achievements am I most proud of?
7. What values are non-negotiable at work?
8. What patterns am I repeating?

Write your answers honestly and reflect often. As Kleeman says, “These questions help you understand what really drives you so you can find a job you’ll enjoy and stick with for the long haul.”

Charting your course

In a world where loud self-promotion is often lauded, it’s good to know that indulging in some quiet introspection can serve as a powerful tool for job seekers. By identifying your values, understanding your strengths, and reflecting on your patterns, you can map a career path that aligns with who you are and what you need to thrive.

As Kleeman puts it, “Navigating the job market without self-awareness is like setting sail without a compass. You might drift somewhere, but it’s much easier to reach your dream destination when you know exactly where you want to go.” So take the time to tune into yourself—you may be closer to your dream job than you think.

Photo: Welcome to the Jungle

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